Monday, August 01, 2005

Idle Questions

• Aren’t Jessica Simpson, Lindsay Lohan and Hillary Duff just the Bobby Rydells of contemporary pop?

• What is the logic behind movie remakes of TV shows that went off the air decades before the movies’ target audience was even born? Seriously, what?

• Isn’t it a bit racist for white writers to refer to 50 Cent as “Fiddy”? Or is the literary equivalent to blackface somehow excusable in hip-hop?

• Have you ever met anyone who thought “Marmaduke” was funny?

• Am I the only person who thinks of Mohawk-wearing teen punks as rock’s answer to Civil War re-enactors?

• Considering that any kid smart enough to have run the Hot Coffee mod on GTA San Andreas would likely have also been able to download several gigs of internet porn, isn't it a bit silly to worry about the adverse affects of a few badly animated sex scenes?

• Why hasn’t there been movie of The Simpsons?

• Now that Nirvana, the Pixies and Smashing Pumpkins have attained nostalgia status, isn’t it time we gave up the fiction that their music is in any way alternative?

• What does it say about the current state of literacy that Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, a children’s book, is a more demanding read than The DaVinci Code?

• How could Lemmy from Mötorhead have any hearing left?

• Who will be the first idiot politician to propose a bill banning the sale of acetone?

• At the moment, the members of Mötley Crüe range in age from 42 to 49. How many years must we wait before their “babe magnet” act becomes officially embarrassing?

Comments:
Hah, about Bewitched I think the Voice said it best: "It is an affliction. As if the work of an angry god [...] coalescing into a showbiz self-suck unrivaled in modern times for smugness, vapidity, and condescension. To spend even 10 minutes in the movie's universe is to experience the Sartrean nausea of an utterly hollow head and heart."
 
Weirdest thing (possibly) about Jessica Simpson: she is still the creator (or the voice in front of) one of my five favourite singles this decade, "The Sweetest Sin." Because I think Bobby Rydell's version of "Volare" is quite wonderful as well (while admitting I coudn't hum a single other tune by him), I'll assume your comparison is a compliment!
 
Carl, I belive the Brady Bunch movies did pretty well, but that sprang from a concept developed outside of Hollywood. There is, of course, the aspect of creative property ownership to consider; if you, as a studio, already own the concept, title and characters, development becomes cheaper and the potential payoff via cross-marketing becomes bigger. But you'd think after such stinkers as the movie version Dragnet and Flintstones that someone would have learned by now.

I don't know that the Rydell comparison was intended as a compliment, Scott, so much as a comment on the artists' ultimate ephemerality. But as we all know, even the most negligible artists sometimes deliver killer singles.

As for the Voice review, r., Sartrean??? That's a bit of a stretch, however much it allows the reviewer to seem superior to the work.
 
Isn’t it a bit racist for white writers to refer to 50 Cent as “Fiddy”? Or is the literary equivalent to blackface somehow excusable in hip-hop?

Does it matter that 50 Cent is the 21st century Stepin Fetchit (minus the dignity)?
 
Danyel, what am I missing? It' not like I don't enjoy dogs in the comics; Get Fuzzy and Mutts are at the top of my daily comics cruise, and I also get a laugh out of the dog jokes in Overboard, Pooch Cafe and For Better or For Worse. Please let me know what I'm failing to catch in Marmaduke.
 
I'll take "Fiddy" over "Fitty"

i mean, "Fitty" - like, "sorta fits"?

-jon c.
 
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