Saturday, April 01, 2006
Klactoveesedstene
A joke:
The drugs having finally worked their way through his system, Charlie Parker returns from the grave and announces he’s going to start playing again — once he gets his alto out of hock. The news sets off a media sensation, and soon offers are pouring in from various firms wanting to “present” Parker’s return. Ultimately, Pepsi (hoping to boost sales by luring Boomers away from Starbucks) makes the highest offer, and Bird is set to make his comeback in a Pepsi ad.
Soon, it’s the big day. An all-star rhythm section has been assembled, a string section has been hired, arrangements have been written, and a very select group of guests have assembled to hear the first Charlie Parker solo in over 50 years. Finally, the cameras are in place, the microphones are ready, and Parker enters the studio to tumultuous applause.
He puts horn to mouth, nods to the conductor, and the music begins. The audience is transported, as half a century of bottled-up improvisation flows into the room. When the music ends, there’s profound silence, then riotous applause. Some of the guests and most of the musicians are in tears. Parker beams.
Then, from the PA, comes the voice of Pepsi’s creative director. “That’s great man, great. Just incredible,” he says. “Now for the second take, could you make it sound more like David Sanborn?”
The drugs having finally worked their way through his system, Charlie Parker returns from the grave and announces he’s going to start playing again — once he gets his alto out of hock. The news sets off a media sensation, and soon offers are pouring in from various firms wanting to “present” Parker’s return. Ultimately, Pepsi (hoping to boost sales by luring Boomers away from Starbucks) makes the highest offer, and Bird is set to make his comeback in a Pepsi ad.
Soon, it’s the big day. An all-star rhythm section has been assembled, a string section has been hired, arrangements have been written, and a very select group of guests have assembled to hear the first Charlie Parker solo in over 50 years. Finally, the cameras are in place, the microphones are ready, and Parker enters the studio to tumultuous applause.
He puts horn to mouth, nods to the conductor, and the music begins. The audience is transported, as half a century of bottled-up improvisation flows into the room. When the music ends, there’s profound silence, then riotous applause. Some of the guests and most of the musicians are in tears. Parker beams.
Then, from the PA, comes the voice of Pepsi’s creative director. “That’s great man, great. Just incredible,” he says. “Now for the second take, could you make it sound more like David Sanborn?”
// posted by J.D. Considine @ 2:41 p.m. 
Comments:
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I read your rambling rant in Rolling Stone (online) of "Number of the Beast." Aside from being poorly written, only giving the actual album only one paragraph, it shows a complete lack of musical taste. Since it was written before I was born, it can be a difficult listen, but the overwhelming consensus is that it is probably the greatst album from one of the greatest bands of all time. Calling this 'bad music' is insane. "Hallowed be thy Name" is one of the greatest songs of all time. No wonder you write for Rolling Stone. Keep watching MTV and pretending the White Stripes are actually any good at all.
# posted by 
: 4:18 a.m.
: 4:18 a.m.
Of course some folks tase is only in their mouth as proven by the above. If you truly loved Maiden so much you would surely have the cojones to sign yr post. Weak.
But that's not why i'm writing. I'm writing because when I was a kid (probably the same age as the anon poster) I read every Considine review I could get my grubby teen paws on. His writing is probably why I attempt to write about music now. Thank You J.D. for years of inspiration! -Rick Saunders
http://realdeepblues.blogspot.com/
http://ricksaunders.blogspot.com/
But that's not why i'm writing. I'm writing because when I was a kid (probably the same age as the anon poster) I read every Considine review I could get my grubby teen paws on. His writing is probably why I attempt to write about music now. Thank You J.D. for years of inspiration! -Rick Saunders
http://realdeepblues.blogspot.com/
http://ricksaunders.blogspot.com/
# posted by : 10:53 a.m.
: 10:53 a.m.
did it have to end with the producer asking for more sandboresque?? i was thoroughly disappointed but thats the point.i do get it.its just that at 15 bird changed my life dramatically i began to see everything as artistic and my playing transformed from this simple improvisation to very advanced parkeresque solos i amazed my music teacher whom i did not tell i was studying the parker omnibook.he was usually reluctant to give me more than 4 bars to solo after the day i revealed to im that i had been studying not only scales (in all keys) arpegios and the such but also religiously playing birds solos from the omnibook. i remember playing dewey square for him i was elated he chose that one because it was one of the first i studied to memorize but also when i realized what bird was doing with the notes of the particular chord. incredible i thought as i played it through for the 300th time im sure by then. i no longer blow sax but because of that i so much appreciate the work of bird n diz and the rest of the guys...potter...roach and the rest
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